#1 Worst Country Song of the 1990s
On 10-01-2009
at 5:11 pm
You might call this a cop-out, but I didn’t see any alternative. In 1992, the world of country music was introduced to a spiked mullet-Elvis wannabe, Billy Ray Cyrus. His first and only #1 single “Achy Breaky Heart” debuted with startling success. Previous to the song’s popularity, it went through an identity crisis. At first, it was pitched to the Oak Ridge Boys, but they didn’t feel comfortable singing the words ‘achy breaky’. Who could blame them? It was initially recorded by The Marcy Brothers. However, the title was “Don’t Tell My Heart.” This title might have been more endearing, but it was never released as a single. This ultimately paved the way for Cyrus and Don Von Tress(the song’s writer) to make a lot of money.
This song started a merchandising explosion. You couldn’t go to Wal-Mart, a strip mall, or church without seeing someone don a Billy Ray Cyrus t-shirt. Unfortunately, you didn’t see this garb on any attractive women. It was only reserved for those who had permanently tarnished the railing on the buffet line at Golden Corral. It took 9 million albums sold and a few extra belt holes for them to realize that they had made a mistake. That this song is an incoherent mess, and it insulted every one’s intelligence. Lyrics like, “You can tell my arms to go back into the farm, or you can tell my feet to hit the floor,” incite a reactionary, what? It’s not an improvement, but it would make more sense if the phrase was ‘go back to the farm,’ excluding the preposition ‘into.’ Another example is “Tell Your Aunt Louise, Tell her anything you please.” These are just throw away lyrics, with zero emotion. How could anyone feel any connection? I experience no excitement when I hear this song. The song’s repetitiveness translates into a country hybrid of Herman’s Hermits “I’m Henery the Eighth I Am.”
There is really no surprise why the Marcy Brothers did not release this song as a single. It has no substance and no pay-off. It is confectioner’s sugar,and is just a silly rock song, trying to pass as a country song. The chorus is infected with the hokiest hook, that will attached itself to your brain and become your personal soundtrack for the day. It will take every fiber of your being not to drill through your scull and give yourself a lobotomy.
I’m gonna have to agree with you on this Todd. This song definitely get’s my vote for the #1 Worst Country Song of the 90’s.
Maybe Billy Ray’s goal was not to be part of a song that won awards (or awards for its lyrical content), but rather to simply make money. Bad song, but made a lot of money–t/f goal achieved. Many people have made money in much lower fashions. Anyway, I don’t like the song–and don’t listen to Billy Ray–so whatever.
While I have no problem with this song being #1, I notice that you managed to leave out the classics given to us by two big names that are equally bad –
“I Like It I Love It” by Tim McGraw and “Boot Scootin Boogie” by Brooks and Dunn. I can’t remember when it was done or if it was a #1, but Brooks and Dunn should also get a dishonorable mention for “My Maria”. Still makes every filling in my mouth hurt when they screech those high notes.
Sandra
All of your picks are great. Regarding “My Maria,” I never even liked B.W. Stevenson’s version.